What comes to mind when you think about your mom?
When I think of my mom the very first thing, I think of is how hard she worked. Like, WORKED! The woman had 2-3 jobs to support her 5 children. She was a single a mom. The second thing I think of is if there was something that needed done no matter what it was, she did it. A life lesson for me was don’t waste time waiting around for anyone else to do it for you, just go do it! And third, always providing for her kids even when it sacrificed her own needs. (another life lesson there)
My mom was not at my sporting events, she did not take me to practice or games. If I was playing a sport in school then it was my responsibility to get my ass where it needed to be and then home. Same with school. If I needed extra help, (which I did with math) it was my responsibility to get it, and again get the ride to and from.
I did not have the latest and greatest material item, nor did I have money given to me for a “team” jacket or “warm up uniform”. If I wanted it, I paid it myself.
There were no “keeping up with Jones’” here.
So, as I find myself with the greatest and yet most difficult job of being a “mom” of two very active boys; I sit back and have to laugh a little. I rush around making sure all needs are met, my truck should have an “uber” sticker on the windshield for all the driving involved to get the boys to every event in their current schedule. My budget busts the seems with each new season, registration, cleats, new uniform, equipment, etc.
When I think back to how I felt emotionally about my youth, I feel satisfied. Did I dislike that I did not have “new” clothes or shoes for every event? Yeah, but I got over it. Was it a pain to get rides to where I needed to go because my mom worked to provide for us? Yep, but I got over it. Was it embarrassing that we didn’t have a big fancy house, or that we moved often and I had to meet and make new friends each time? Sometimes, yes, BUT I got over it.
For all the moms, who lead a similar schedule as mine with kids needing to go here and there, to the never-ending payments for this and that. Step back and remember where you came from. Most of us did with a lot less than our kids have today. And we survived.
I know my mom loved me unconditionally by the actions she showed and the life lessons I learned, not by material possessions.
When my boys are adults and raising their children, I hope they look back and remember the life lessons they were taught by the actions of us, their mom and dad.
The only thing I wish I would have had more of as a kid was more time with my mom. She worked a lot; I still miss the moments she couldn’t be at my games or events. As an adult, I wish I would have visited more often, had more lunches, or talked more often.
If you feel your life is too busy, too chaotic. If you feel you just don’t have “time”. I hope you take a moment while scrolling social media, or watching that favorite show, to realize missed opportunities that you will never get back.
There is always time to do more. Find it, create it. Unload what you “think” is so necessary and you may just be amazed at how much time you actually have.
Now, make sure to call your mom, buy a card and write in it how grateful you are for her, call her, buy some flowers, visit, go to lunch. Make a weekly/monthly date with her.
One day you will wake up and realize you ran out of time being too busy for those that truly matter.
Dedicated to my mom- Sandy Stover (January 25, 1945 – November 11, 2008)
Forever in my heart and grateful for the life lessons she instilled in me.
Happy Mother’s Day!
DO THE WORK!